Long time no talk. It has been one of those past couple of weeks where I have had no time to sit down and clear my mind with some writing haha. I hope you guys enjoy this post. I know what motivated me to write this but I had a bit of a rough time finding the words. I needed to write this without opinion, without confrontation and without confusion. I hope you enjoy!
This title might sound familiar to you. It’s a country song actually, “Middle of a Memory” by Cole Swindell.
An old friend once told me “Every memory has a song”. (read
that again.) For a second I was like, “What??” But then it clicked! I had never heard something so accurate before. Every moment we live, there’s a song somewhere out there that fits those moments.
How many times does a song come on the radio or on your phone and it gives you the slightest knot in your stomach? As for myself, it happens with a few songs and I’m sure you can guess that “Middle of a Memory” is one of them. No matter where you’re at in life you will always have memories from the past. Good and Bad. Of course we all cling to our good memories but we have to be reminded of the bad sometimes too. They keep us going, believe it or not. I decided to share with you all a couple of my own.
“A Song For Mama” by Boys to Men.
If you’re from my close family then you most likely know why this song hits home for me. When I was around 7 years old, I heard the heart trenching news of my grandma passing away. She had gone to the hospital once before, went back home and then the following day had to go back. She passed away at the hospital in August of 2006. What a great way to spend Summer huh? Not to mention, this month has a lot of our birthdays in it as well...not a very fun year for any of us. The "A Song For Mama" was one of the songs chosen by our family members to be played at her services. I had never heard it before that day. It's an older music group so makes sense given the fact I was younger than 10. Anytime the melody of this song begins, I immediately have a flashback to me sitting there in a pew, at our catholic church looking straight at the casket where my grandma lay. Behind her was a big white screen sharing photos of my beautiful grandma wearing her best smile, surrounded by her best family. Many of our families memories with her were being shared right behind her, knowing none of us will be able to create anymore. That exact heart aching feeling comes back when this song plays. This is a mixture of a good and bad memory for me yet this song will always, always, always bring me to this moment of my past.
"Middle of a Memory" by Cole Swindell.
Most country songs are now all love songs. The reason I enjoy so much is because each and every one has a story. I mean, all music made has a story but they're sometimes hard to follow. I heard this song for the first time in 2017 when it came out. I was a hug fan of Cole at the time. (still am) Listening to it I had a few different memories of my own come to mind. The thing about a lot of Cole Swindell's music is it can relate to each listener differently yet we are all listening to the same song with the same lyrics and the same tune. The first time I heard this song I thought of my grandma, once again. Cole sings about how someone leaves so sudden that it's like literally them leaving in the middle of a memory. When my grandma passed away, it was sudden from my point of view. I remember being at our neighbors house this morning, waiting for my mom to finally come pick me up and to let me know that everything was OK. Unfortunately I had high hopes because when I went back home my mom sat me on her lap and had to break the news to me that my grandma passed. Just the past day or two I was with her on her front porch spraying bees to get away from her flowerbed. THAT is someone leaving in the middle of a memory to me.
As I grew older and experienced more of life, this song came about another memory of mine... Long story short I met a boy. Tall, masculine, blue-eyed man. I never thought I could love someone other than Taylor yet here I was. Day dreaming of memories after memories made with this handsome man. The way we ended was misleading. I wasn't sure what I wanted in life let alone my love life. He wasn't sure either... The last chance I had given myself (and him) to let him in as more than a friend, he shot me down and told me in the Sonic parking lot,"I think it's better we just stay friends." ouch. I did just that, I took it as a sign of, "Okay Taylor, that means you're it." I said to myself. One year goes by, then the next. I never failed to hear from him for New Years or Christmas. One year he'd message me, the next I'd message him. I'm sure this was just our excuse to see how each other were doin' but that's besides the point. One day, he shoots me a message. Now, I can't remember what in the world we were talking about but I do know he told me that "Middle of a Memory" by Cole Swindell made him think of me.. I hadn't heard the song in a long while so of course I sprung it up on my YouTube and watched the video as it played.
"Oh, my god. I did not do that to this poor man? ... did I?" I had to ask myself as the video showed Cole getting ready to make the next move with his girlfriend yet she left him a note with opposite intentions, nowhere in sight. As I'm sure you've guessed already, every time I hear this song, I get flashbacks of all of the different memories I had made with this man in my past. Then just with a blink, I am back to reality.
The night my old friend told me about each memory having it's own song truly meant something to me. I can't quite put it into words just yet but he was right. Now I don't only think about the good times when certain songs come on but I think of the bad too and I am reminded that it's okay. Everything happens for a reason and my reason today is writing this blog. Thank you guys so much for reading! Don't forget to become a member today to receive notifications any time I make a new blog post! And if you'd like to contact me, please go to the contact tab at the top of the page! xoxo